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| "Three figures in the doorway. Marrakesh" (1932) by Zinaida Serebriakova. |
Reflecting on the racial and class differences between her on one side (Asian-American, working-class) and Sam and Maggie on the other (white, wealthy), the main character describes herself as "a door to a wider world" and Maggie as "a door back into his own home. Someone his mother would love"(59).
This way of looking at relationships attributes special value to those that bridge racial and social class differences. Presumably, relationships of this kind are gateways to a wider world of experience.
Why do you think some people seek out relationships of this kind? More broadly speaking, what kind of people are drawn to new and different experiences and relationships and what kind of poeple are drawn to familiar experiences? How often is an interest in exploring difference associated with dissatisfaction with or disapproval of one's own background, race or social class? In the communities you grew up in, how are these kinds of experiences and relationships encouraged or discouraged?
Some of them do it out for curiosity and novelty, and others just want to challenge themselves, but I think most do not think about it too much until they are fully hit with the reality of their situation.
ReplyDeleteI believe the type of people that seek relationships with people that grew up in different cultures and environments are more likely either not like the environment they grew up in, or they want to explore more of the world's places and cultures. They would have to be open minded enough to accept these new cultures so they can truly understand them. In my own home, while it isn't forced in any way, I can tell that my mother would be more content if I was in a relationship of someone of the same race (African American). However, this has never been something she has said to me directly, as she believes its ultimately my choice in the end.
ReplyDelete1) There’s many reasons people might seek relationships outside of their community; some like the outside perspective (i.e. opposites attract), some are attracted to features of other communities, and others might want to get away from their own community.
ReplyDelete2) I think most people that seek relationship(s) with people outside of their background are both open minded and have usually grown up in a more diverse environment. From what I’ve seen, people who don’t form relationships outside of their community generally haven’t had much exposure outside of that community and wish to keep it that way.
3) I do think there are several people who choose to seek relationships outside of their culture due to negative experiences, but I don’t think this makes up the majority of people in split background relationships.
4) From my experience, relationships outside of the community aren’t very encouraged. Some of this is because you’re fed a very specific idea of what the ‘ideal relationship’ should look like, and people generally carry these ideas into their adulthood and adult relationships. At best, people are just ignorant of outside communities, and at worst, people have an unfair prejudice against outside communities.
I think that some people seek out relationships of this kind out of curiosity or even longing for a view into other people's lives. I would say that people who are disappointed with their own background tend to seek those of the opposite, so that they can catch a glimpse or experience such a life for themselves. These types of relationships could be discouraged because of the idea that they are 'too different', but it is also encouraged by others because 'opposites attract' and 'differences make the relationship more interesting.'
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