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| "Basket of Bread: Rather Death than Shame" (1945) by Salvador Dali |
Have you ever found that sharing insecurities helped you succeed in a difficult endeavor?
Does sharing insecurities come more easily to you than it does to other people you know or is it more difficult for you?
What do you think accounts for the difference between people who have trouble sharing insecurities and those who do not?
Can you think of a situation in which sharing insecurities is counterproductive?
I strongly believe that sharing any insecurities, however small, even just saying them out loud once in awhile, helps you conquer that part of you that may be insecure about. I used to always hide the things that made me seem weaker than those around me. Now I have come to terms with it and am able to talk about those things. Being open about insecurities helps people overcome something that might otherwise hold them back. Sharing insecurities isn't always the easiest thing, depending on who you are talking to about it, how well you know them, and how well you know yourself. Sometimes you can talk about a physical insecurity more easily than a mental or emotional one. Being more on the introverted side and watching those who are more extroverted, it seems easier for them to talk about things with people- but everyone has insecurities that they'd rather not share. I had trouble for awhile with sharing insecurities with anyone, whether it was friends I've had for years, someone I just met, or my long term boyfriend. After years of struggling I can openly talk about a lot more than I used to. That openness came with feeling more secure in myself and changing myself to be okay with who I am and the difficulties I face and the ones I was afraid to talk about. I don't think you can really pinpoint the exact reason for being able to share and not share insecurities, but I do believe being introverted or extroverted contributes. Although sharing insecurities can help you overcome them and help others get to know you better, if you share them with the wrong person they can make you feel like crap and point out all those little or big insecurities that you hate, which in turn would make you keep things to yourself from now on and probably become even more insecure.
ReplyDeleteI really like what you said about how sharing our insecurities makes us more likely to overcome it. I have a best friend of around 5 years this month and every time I feel doubtful about something, I call her. When I first entered ninth grade I had a lot on my plate and I felt as if I was trapped. One day while at her house, I confessed everything that was troubling me and I begin to keep my head above the water. I felt more confident in myself knowing that I did not have to lock away my worries to rot and get worse but rather get them off my chest so I could be free. However, like you said, you have to truly be careful who you trust in telling certain things and I was fortunate to have made the incredible friend I had. To conclude, I feel comfortable sharing my insecurities with those I trust and would only imagine it to be counterproductive if you told someone who would use those against you. Sometimes we NEED to be comfortable with our weaknesses in order to improve.
Delete-Chance Zernicek
I believe sharing our insecurities is great as it allows us to be honest with ourselves and others. If we try to pretend that we are not insecure in a certain regard that we are, we our trying to suppress it, which causes the insecurities to go unaddressed. This allows them to keep festering. A productive way to reduce or possibly even eliminate an insecurity is by hearing the stories of others who have or have had the same insecurity. I'm confident of this because I have noticed it in myself. I'm much less self conscious than how I used to be because I eventually realized that I am not just some special unlucky guy that has it worse than everybody. Rather, I am just a normal guy like who has problems and insecurities like everyone else. This realization made me more self confident because, even though my insecurities silently existed, I knew that it was just part of being human.
ReplyDelete- Jacob Talkington
I have had numerous successes that can be attributed to sharing my insecurities. One recent example was in my AP Calculus class. I felt pressured to immediately understand everything because several classmates would ask me, one of the supposed math geniuses, to help with their homework. Much to my then fixed minded horror, the class was really a challenge for me. I did not quickly grasp the new concepts, and I felt insecure about my ability to perform high level math and my chances of passing the AP test. Finally, I expressed my concern to my excelling peer, an alumni who passed the AP test, and my teacher. I found out that my classmate and the former student felt the same, and it was comforting to know they both succeeded without feeling perfect. My teacher opened my eyes to my progress and results gained from getting extra help. These individuals helped me to stop worrying about anyone’s perception of me. As a result, I focused on making daily improvement, even if it meant asking a lot of questions in class. Calculus became my favorite class because I was certain I would learn something new every day. When I found out that I passed the AP Calculus test, I was elated. I knew it was not proof of my intelligence, but a testament to the entire process.
ReplyDelete-Brittany West
I am a worrier. I constantly worry about things, and often find myself thinking of past mistakes, scared for the future. As a result, I also seek constant affirmation. So, I used to overshare my insecurities in hopes teachers, coaches, and teammates would reassure me. While Dweck mentioned that occasional confidence boosts are needed with life's minor stresses (breakups, one bad test, etc.), she clearly conveys that honesty and advice in the situation is vital to growth.
ReplyDeleteI have not seen improvement after admitting insecurities yet, but I have seen improvement in the parallel. Rather than living off hollow praise, I have tried to reign in these tendencies and look in the mirror to see myself as I am. Only when I see where I am and what I need to move forward do I excel.
Insecurities can be seen often as a weakness, although I like to view them as parts of my character that I just need to work on. Sharing these insecurities has really helped me in most of my endeavors, because it takes pressure off of me, and helps others realize that they are not facing this alone. It mostly helped me when I faced a class I thought was too overwhelming, or too advanced for me. Most of the time when I share my insecurities I can see the relief on other student's face's. Everybody thinks that they are the odd person out, when in reality, we are all just trying to "fake it until we make it". It is important to keep a growth mindset in mind when tackling new adventures, and considering them a way to expand your horizons instead of an impossible task.
ReplyDelete