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| "Defeated. Requiem" (1878) by Vasily Veraschagin |
Think about the people you have grown up with and gone to school with. Without naming names, how would you characterize their responses to failure? Have you noticed a tendency to blame others? Or a tendency to blame a lack of innate ability?
Do you know many people who tend to claim that the things they failed at are unimportant to them? What about people who resent the success of others? Or people who talk a lot about their failures or are failures the kind of thing people try to move past as quickly as possible?
Do you know many people who tend to claim that the things they failed at are unimportant to them? What about people who resent the success of others? Or people who talk a lot about their failures or are failures the kind of thing people try to move past as quickly as possible?
Some people associate failure with shame. Do you think shame is ever a constructive emotion?
Most of the posts on this website include a cluster of questions like those above. You do not need to answer them all. Feel free to answer any particular questions that push you to reflect more deeply on the relevant issue.
As I was growing up, I have noticed many times the responses of failure- especially in high school. High school appeared to be a breeding ground for negativity which helped cultivate a chain reaction that affected nearly all students. Sadly, I cannot pick one behavior to define how my classmates reacted because they unfortunately displayed a multitude of them. For example, after a big test I would often hear the laments of students who did not pass to which they either blamed the teacher or just claimed that they were not smart enough for the material (despite not even TRYING to study or pass). So for me, I have seen both tendencies from my classmates in school. A majority of the time I would overhear students shrugging off their bad grade because they would “never use it” past high school. It was as if they were justifying their actions as “right” which is truly a pity. Now there were some students who did feel a degree of guilt for making a bad grade and they often felt shameful. I personally do not think there is a problem with having shame so long as you learn from the situation. If you genuinely want to improve, then that is a wonderful way to channel a bad grade into motivation. Let’s face it, we all have days where we are not always our strongest, but if we try and not demonstrate the behaviors like some of those of my classmates, then we will be just fine.
ReplyDelete-Chance Zernicek
Growing up playing basketball, I heard the phrase "Short Term Memory" a lot. That is, if we lost a game, we needed to forget about it and get ready for the next one. We could not change the outcome, so we needed to work hard and get ready for the next game. To me, failure is not something you should dwell on. We should use that failure as fuel to prepare for our next contest, be it athletics or academics. I have seen people that let their failures eat at them until they cannot take it anymore. This causes them to consistently do bad. They become so obsessed with not failing, that they affect themselves negatively.
ReplyDeleteShame can be a very powerful emotion. To me, shame has negative connotations. It is natural to feel disappointed after a failure. But, shame can make a person feel almost depressed. The dictionary definition of shame is "a painful feeling of humiliation or distress caused by the consciousness of wrong or foolish behavior". Shame is a feeling that can make a person become almost depressed. To me, it is not good to be ashamed of yourself. It is okay to be disappointed, but we need to look to the future, not live in the past.
-Tyler Macon
The thought of someone being ashamed of you or feeling ashamed of yourself for something you’ve done wrong is never a pleasant feeling. How a person takes that feeling and uses it depends on the mindset. Shame for the fixed mindset will debilitate the person and make them believe that they are not good enough. They will feel as if all eyes are on them and they cannot turn the situation around. They will take that emotion to heart and carry it around like a heavy weight on their shoulders. While on the other hand, shame for the growth mindset creates a burning fire deep in the soul. They will take their problems and face them head on because they know that the situation can be improved. The situation itself may not ever be the same, but people with the growth mindset will make it to where the internal conflicts within their minds are resolved. They will use shame as the fuel to ignite the issue before them. Thus, I believe shame within the growth mindset is a constructive emotion while shame within the fixed mindset is a destructive emotion.
ReplyDeleteI don't think that I could have said that better. Shame is the immediate reaction to failure. No one is proud of their mistakes. Fixation is the determinant factor between the positive and negative effects of shame. You must quickly make the transition from failure to solution!
ReplyDelete--Sierra Rankin
When I was growing up, the people that I observed responding to failure were my family. My mom is an intelligent person. Even though she only went to the ninth grade, she was able to teach me math and reading skills before I would learn them in school. Several times throughout my childhood I would ask her why she didn't graduate or why she would not work toward a college degree. The response was the same every time. "I am not smart enough." She was one of those who had a tendency to blame a lack of innate ability. There were several others along the way that had a tendency to blame others. No matter what the situation, they refused to admit failures or shortcomings. These people were prime examples of those with a fixed mindset. There was no trying to advance in life, only "an it is what it is" attitude. When it comes to shame, it is not a constructive emotion. The humiliation that we experience from shame is to be expected. When it gets to the point that you are in a state of distress it is unhealthy.
ReplyDeleteThe most common place I have witness people deal with their failures would be my four years of high school. Many times during classes, I recall students complaining that the tests or the subjects were too hard, too difficult to comprehend. There was this one class I took during my Junior year where students actively begged for some kind of review, as the teacher would just hand out notes and tell us to read from the textbook, but upon never getting one, they would just shrug and fail the test. I believe they developed apathy towards the class and its material. Being apathetic saved them from having to feel the guilt of not reaching the standard schools make us believe we should be, thus leading to a cycle of failure. Uncaring, failing, repeat, a process I myself am guilty of. Dismissing things on your own terms feels infinitely better than being dismissed by others.
ReplyDelete-Kassie Batt
Like you, I really noticed the many different reactions to failure in high school. Some students had the "it doesn't really matter how I do in this class" one, as well as the "I'm just not smart enough to make good grades" reaction. The most common one that I noticed, however, was the tendency to blame the teacher for a failure.
DeleteA great example of this is seen by students who had Biology, Chemistry, and Anatomy at my school. The teacher of these subjects often gave difficult tests that covered fairly large quantities of material and for some reason, most of his classes failed them despite the fact that he covered all the material with them for several days prior to the tests and even passed out study guides to help them prepare. Why was this the case? Regardless of all the help that he gave them, most of the students did not pay attention during reviews and did not even bother to study for the test until about 10 minutes before it began.
I cannot tell you how many students came to me personally and complained about this teacher after they failed these tests, claiming that they were "too hard" or "incorrectly graded". If they were not complaining about their grade, they were saying things like, "He's such a bad teacher" or "I don't know why he hates me so much". Instead of looking at themselves and realizing that they did not prepare enough, they assigned blame to the teacher for their failure. I think that if they would have used these failures in a constructive way, they would have seen some improvement in grades.
-Kaylee George
I have had the same thing happen to me many times as well. Over hearing students complaining about the class or the teacher, once even had a someone in my biology class say that he was not going to college because the World History teacher was too "harsh" and "unforgiving", and thought that meant he was not a good fit for college. While I did not like the teacher either, it was sad seeing someone write off such an important experience like going to college because they felt they could not improve and become better than what they current were.
DeleteI noticed this also during my AP Literature class my junior year. She was a new instructor that had just moved out of the middle school, and she was very passionate about what she did. She had warned that the class would be hard and no one took her seriously. Even I didn't. Granted, we hadn't really had a English teacher that stimulated our minds until we met this particular teacher, but I had never seen so many parents come up to the school. Kids were dropping out of AP like flies. They made no efforts to study and they rarely did assignments because of the "extra work". They claimed that they "couldn't do it". Her class was probably the most important class that I took all throughout my high school years because she challenged us, and taught helpful tips that I used on all my college reading, and I still use. The kids that dropped struggled during their Higher Ed classes, and many failed Comp just because they were too scared of a bad grade to prepare themselves for a college course.
DeleteLindsey Wallace
I have witnessed a wide variety of responses to failure including labels, blame, and disappointment. I especially noticed labelling in high school as we constantly tried to determine our identity. People often began to say things such as “I am not good at it,” “There’s nothing I can do to change,” or “I guess this is the way I am,” after a challenging test or a poor life decision. The book states those with the fixed mindset may alter their opinions about themselves after a failure; unfortunately I have seen this behavior. During my junior year of high school, we had a U.S. History teacher who was notorious for her difficult tests. People who previously never made anything but A’s received D’s for the first time. Reflecting on it now, I see that it clearly separated those who would crumble in the face of a challenge from those who would work hard to perform better the next time. Their responses aligned with their mindsets: “My GPA is undoubtedly going to decrease this year. I knew I was not one of the smart kids” or conversely, “After seeing this test, I know how to better prepare next time, and I know I need to spend more time studying.” Some blamed their failure on their teacher, their upbringing, or their time involved in activities. A mindset is a choice regardless of circumstances; each of us made a choice and reaped the fruit of that decision. I wonder if being conscious of the growth and fixed mindsets and their respective effects would have changed their mindsets.
ReplyDeleteBrittany West
My best friend in high school was not afraid to fail. However, the people around her were afraid to see her fail because she turned into a complete monster. Imagine Godzilla wreaking havoc on New York City. That was how she reacted to just about every failure she came across. She did not stress about tests or softball games. She was aware that tests were coming and she knew when her team played a tougher opponent. She also knew that there would be no judgement cast upon her if she failed. I think she just did not know how to cope with it.
ReplyDeleteShe is the type of person to point fingers and blame others for her results. She would fail tests and immediately be at the teacher's desk arguing her grade and spewing profanities when there was no leniency on the grade. She would not study harder. She is also the type of person to lose a game and blame her teammates for their poor plays, even if she made mistakes as well. She did not stay late to practice.
Even if she isn't afraid of failure, is she still in a fixed mindset?
Lindsey, I have had a couple of friends who are the same way about failure. I will try to console them or wait patiently as they throw tantrums because they did not win, succeed, or do as well as they had hoped. They view failure as a reason for shame, and will throw everything down in a state of distress.
DeleteI would say that your friend has a fixed mindset of sorts. Though she is ready to through herself in to situations without hesitation, she does not try to further her skill by staying late and practicing or studying, like you said. If she thinks she can't do any better than she is already doing and instead blaming others for her failure, then I would agree with Noah and say she has a fixed mindset.
People respond to failure is a variety of ways. I think that it also depends on the type of “failure,” whether it is big or small. Most people respond negatively to failure, especially in sports and school. I’ve seen girls cry over losing a regular season basketball game or getting beat by one of their own teammates in a race. To me these responses are ridiculous, but I’ve never liked failure much myself. I don’t think that a negative response has to be a bad response. Yes, I do believe it’s better to brush things off and say you’ll do better next time, or work to fix it, but sometimes you have to really believe you failed in order to do something about it.
ReplyDeleteI think that some people do resent the success of others. That’s why some people say things like, “wow, why are you studying right now?” or “why are you doing that extra workout?” It’s because they do not want you to work harder than them, and be better. We shame others for doing things that we are too lazy to do, just so we don’t feel bad for not doing them. I’ve caught myself doing this rather than telling people good job for putting in the extra work, and I have also caught myself being embarrassed to put in extra work. To me this shows me that most people are more concerned that other’s might succeed without them, rather than making sure they succeed.
In high school after my classmates would receive their tests back you would begin to hear the comments they made about why they failed a test. Some would say that they just were not good at whatever subject it was in and that is why they failed, not because they did not study. Other comments would be made about how the teacher taught the class. They said the teachers did not explain the material well enough for them to understand and that is why they failed the test. Not because they did not take notes or stay after class to try and get extra help. Some people would look at others' tests and see that the made an A and say "I would have passed this test if I was as smart as you." All of the excuses I heard were just that, excuses. It was an opportunity to place the blame on anyone other than themselves. They would not face the fact of if they would have put the extra effort in they could have passed the test.
ReplyDeleteMy high school football team was no stranger to failure. During my ninth and tenth grade years we did not win a single game. I can remember blaming myself for not training hard enough or not doing my best. My teammates on the other hand had just given up hope entirely. During every game as soon as we had gotten behind we would start making multiple errors one after another. We averaged 5 turn overs per game. All after we started losing. It made me so mad to see people just giving up. I hated being on a team where I knew my teammates did not care wether we had won or lost. It was terrible for the two or three of us who actually cared about trying our hardest even in the face of defeat. To make things worse we had kids who weren't trying there best blaming our losses on ones who were! If we could have come together and practiced harder there were a few games we actually could have won.
ReplyDeleteMy junior year at Ada High, my entire team qualified for state. My doubles partner and I even placed first in our regional tournament, which was a huge accomplishment for us, as I was a new addition to the team. However, despite our impressive performance at regional's, we choked in our second and third match. Which took our team from placing second, to seventh place. My doubles partner and I were responsible for this loss and the entire team knew it. Because of this loss, our team was extremely motivated to practice harder than ever for next year. Although I personally did not make the team the next year, my teammates went on to win the state championship the year after our devastating loss. Our victory can be attributed to the shame that we all felt after our defeat the year prior.
ReplyDeleteComing from a small school, every one and there cousin played sports. Iv seen a multitude of reactions to my home team losing game after game. Unfortunately when I played softball, we only won two games in the entirety of our season. Our coach had the tendency to talk down to us and highlight the loss, but failed in helping us by pointing out what we could do next to succeed and grow. Along side with my coach I have seen many different players and their reactions to failure. My best friend after losing a game would run four miles to increase her stamina ever after just playing a whole game. While other girls would point out reasons why we lost but never work to improve it. And then just like on any time we would have a "rage monster" or just a girl who could not get pass the fact that we lost and would spiral out into a for of rage. I do think shame is a constructive emotion if you want it to be. Personally for me I hate to feel ashamed of myself and will always work to not feel that way again.
ReplyDelete-Brooke hill
I have met many people in my time at New Lima high school who tend to act as if the things they care about are unimportant once they fail. For instance, many of my high school friends would talk nonstop about how much they loved a certain sport and how important it was to them for weeks upon weeks. If they ever failed to make the team, they immediately began to say things like "I don't care anyways," and "it is a dumb sport, who cares?" Those same people would then begin to talk negatively about the people who did make the team. Proving that they were still upset, and clearly resented the success of their peers. In my experiences, those people refused to talk about their own failures after the fact, thinking that it would make them appear weak. They would continue to tear others down rather than confess their own failures.
ReplyDeleteGrowing up, and especially in school, it is really easy to get discouraged. When one has a fixed mindset, it can also be really easy to stay discouraged. Some of my friends’ responses to failure were not always the best. If they got a bad grade on a test, they would let it spiral them into a period of self loathing and just a general lack of motivation and disinterest. I think different people blame different things on their failure. I know, personally, sometimes when I did not study enough for a test I knew I should have studied harder for, in my mind I would blame the teacher for the disappointing grade I would get, because either the test they made did not make sense or they did not adequately teach the material. In reality, it was just because I did not put in an extra hour or two to study. With a growth mindset, instead of blaming others I should have taken this as an opportunity to grow and realize that for the next test, I should study harder. In high school, and even right now in college, it is easy to see something little and fixable as the end of the world. We are in such a dynamic time in our lives right now, and therefore we cannot remain in the fixed mindset if we are going to grow. If you live your life pursuing a growth mindset and choose to see discouraging situations as a way to grow and learn, it will make things so much easier. I have seen it too many times where people let one bad thing get them into a rut that they cannot escape from, and this is due to the fixed mindset.
ReplyDeleteI knew many people growing up that would make excuses, myself included, when things just wouldn’t go the way they were supposed to. All the people I remember had reputations for being great at something and would have to make excuses any time they didn’t live up to those standards. The excuses were usually flimsy at best and most of the time you could see right through it but if you questioned the excuse you would usually receive anger and be targeted for one of your own flaws.
ReplyDeleteI also remember a lot of jealousy and comparing different people. Well they made a good grade because their parents are rich and can afford a tutor. Or, their dad is a doctor so they have to do good in math. Or even, well their parents graduated from college they probably did the work for that student, because you know that they aren’t that smart.
I personally remember feeling overwhelming shame for almost every aspect of my life. Are you wearing the right clothes, are you getting the right grades, do you have the right friends, do you have the right family...I don’t think shame itself is constructive. But I do know that it is something that we all face in some shape or form in our life and we must know how to identify it for what it is and how to cope with those feelings so that it doesn’t negatively impact your life.
-Heather Swan
From the time I started Pre-K until I graduated high school, my best friend was the most popular girl, most talented, and the prom queen type. She was extremely successful and rarely failed, but those failures were met with a nuclear response. She did not get cheer captain, not because she was not talented enough, but because in her words, "this is the coach's last year, so she does not care," and "there was something sketchy in the scoring." She was never able to accept that she was not going to be the best at everything she did. She also acted as if things that she failed at were of no importance to her.
ReplyDeleteMiKayla Lott
I have noticed a lot of people who dislike taking blame for their actions. No one wants to be wrong, because it is associated with feeling bad about oneself. I believe that people need to stop characterizing someone being wrong as them being lesser. Knowledge is a beautiful thing and should be spread everywhere, but if people are afraid to speak their minds then they will continue to be ignorant of things. We learn by communication primarily and if we cannot use communication to learn then we will surely see a decrease in intelligence overall. I believe people who use the coping mechanism of saying things are unimportant after failing need to be supported. As a whole, we need to stop looking down on failure and instead move on and encourage people who fail to succeed. It is okay to fail, life will continue to be. Although this judgmental society that we are a part of see’s the reward in emotionally shaming “losers” and praising “winners”, it is morally wrong. No one should feel bad about failing. No one is perfect.
ReplyDelete-Makala Millhollon
We tend to grow up observing how others act, so that we may learn how we should act. So how those around us react to failure plays a large role in how we will react. My parents are those who never give up, even when they have failed. They get back up and keep going. My older brother though, he has always been one who would quit when “the going gets tough.” For me the two different influences of how to react to failure has shaped me as a person. When things get hard one of my first reactions is to just stop and quit. My younger brother has this reaction to most things and therefore he tends to not think he is smart enough, or talented enough to complete the task at hand. I on the other hand, will tend to reassess the situation and look at it as a chance to grow.
ReplyDeletent to high school with a guy who was so enthusiastic and open in all of the sports he played. He did not have a very athletic build, but was active in almost all of the sports offered at my school. All of my friends loved him because he was so passionate about every game that he played. Although he did not start varsity or even play in every game, he was always encouraging all of the other players. I believe that we all loved him so much because even though he was not the star athlete he just enjoyed playing the game so much. He was never really picked on in school simply because everyone admired him so much. He even ended up winning an MVP athlete award at the end of the year by the head coach of my school. So I do not believe that a person can fail and only be stuck in a fixed, jealous mindset. This dude played with the best of them and not once became discouraged by their success and his "shortcomings". I love that even when losing at something a person can still be in a growth mindset and can accept what they can do without worrying so much about what they cannot do. Failure is more often than not a very difficult thing to deal with and it can make or break the attitude you have towards an area or subject. I sometimes think of this guy even today and his thrill he had even when "failing" was in everything he did as an athlete by some people's standards.
ReplyDeleteKay'Lee Maddox
Obviously, different people react to situations in various ways. The same can be said for how people react to failure. Personally, I see failure as an opportunity to grow, learning from the mistakes I made, correcting them, and hoping for a better outcome with my next attempt. Continuing to make the same mistakes and hope for a different turn out-that is, to not try and grow from one's failure but expect different results-is the very definition of insanity.
DeleteI have met several people who blame their lack of success on things "not being important" to them. "Well, I stopped trying in that class, which is why I got a D." "I don't really need that job anyway. I can do better." People often times do this in order to feel better. The same way they resent others for doing well in work, relationships, or school. Some people are extremely petty and want nothing more than to see others fail. It is a sad part of society, but it happens. I look at someone's success and it pushes me harder to be like them. These are just a few of the ways "failure" impacts people. We need to use our failures to push us, not hinder us.
Madison McNeill
As an athlete, I experienced failure and I saw others experience it as well. One of the most common responses to failure was anger. A swimmer (I participated competitively in swimming) would realize they did not achieve the time they had their hearts set on and throw their cap and goggles on the deck in a tantrum. In that moment, they were defined by their failure. Another common reaction was crying. In sports, you are more often than not emotionally tied to how well you do in competition. Failing to meet their set goal causes a lot of people to become sad and cry in front of the whole pool. Both of these reactions are caused because how that person views themselves is tied very closely to how well they do in the things in life that they participate in. One trend among both types of people described is that, after the initial emotional trauma, they begin placing the blame on external sources. For example, “I started late,” or “coach has not trained us hard enough this week for me to meet my goal.” -Rachel Worth
ReplyDeleteObviously, different people react to situations in various ways. The same can be said for how people react to failure. Personally, I see failure as an opportunity to grow, learning from the mistakes I made, correcting them, and hoping for a better outcome with my next attempt. Continuing to make the same mistakes and hope for a different turn out-that is, to not try and grow from one's failure but expect different results-is the very definition of insanity.
ReplyDeleteI have met several people who blame their lack of success on things "not being important" to them. "Well, I stopped trying in that class, which is why I got a D." "I don't really need that job anyway. I can do better." People often times do this in order to feel better. The same way they resent others for doing well in work, relationships, or school. Some people are extremely petty and want nothing more than to see others fail. It is a sad part of society, but it happens. I look at someone's success and it pushes me harder to be like them. These are just a few of the ways "failure" impacts people. We need to use our failures to push us, not hinder us.
Madison McNeill
During high school, I played 5 different sports. Yes, 5. It was rough, required hours of hard work and dedication, and kept me busy during my 4 years of high school. But, it taught me a lot. Needless to say, failure was a part of my daily life, especially during practice. Sometimes, I would miss a shot. Sometimes, I would make a bad pass. I tried my best to do better the next time, no matter what the mistake I made was. The people around me though, sometimes had a different approach when it came to why they made a mistake. Often times, one of my teammates would blame another teammate for something that they themselves did wrong. Was that fair? No. Did it happen every single day in practice? Yes. I think that as a player, as a teammate, and as a team itself, it is crucial that when you make a mistake, to not blame others or blame your lack of innate ability. Rather, focus on what you can do better the next time, and don't blame others for something that you did wrong. I've heard this quote a few times over my life and I'm not sure who said it, but I think it goes along with this topic very well. It says "Failure is the key to success." I think that is definitely true, not just in sports, but in life as well. We will never push our limits and push our boundaries as human beings if we don't get out there and start trying, even if we may stumble or fail along the way.
ReplyDeleteGrowing up, I always admired the way that my older brother would react to failure. He was very involved in playing baseball and basketball for our middle school and high school and often times, he was not the tallest or the strongest. Many times, he would be overlooked by the coaches and his teammates, even though he was just as good. His freshman year, he did not get a varsity suit right away. However, he never looked at this as failure. He turned this anger and frustration that he felt into getting better. He would spend multiple hours every day working on his shot, ball handling, and his strength. He proved to everyone that he deserved a better chance and his hard work payed off. He taught me that failure does not have to be a bad thing, it should be an excuse to work that much harder to get better and prove yourself. My brother found the failure to be highly important to him. It would have been easier to take the easy way out and quit, but in life you can never grow as a person if you do not push past the failure and persevere.
ReplyDeleteIn my experience, the people I went to school with handled failure very negatively. The high school I went to was so centered around academic excellence that most of the students took on more than they could handle and ended up stressed and anxious. We had an AP and an IB (international baccalaureate) program that most students were encouraged to be a part of. In our school taking college prep and general education classes was looked down upon. The problem with this is that it forced people into classes that they hated and could not handle just for the sake of looking as smart as their peers. My point in all of this is that the students who got C's or below in IB classes (who would have excelled in college prep classes) were left feeling less intelligent than their peers. Many would walk away from these classes with the idea that they were “too stupid” for these classes; this goes along with the urge to blame a lack of ability when faced with failure. In this case it was not the mindset of one person causing these thoughts, but the mindset of the entire school community. The mindset that if you cannot succeed in IB classes you are not as intelligent as your peers, in this case, was forced on individuals by our schools competitive environment. This created a feeling of resentment between those who were in IB classes and those who were not. It left our school feeling pretty divided.
ReplyDeleteI think most people, at least in my experience, hate to blame themselves for failure. Whether they have to blame a lack of ability or another person, it is very hard to take responsibility for failure. People tend not to dwell on failures, and by that I meant that they are unwilling to bring them up again. Unfortunately, when failures are not brought up and talked about, they are often repeated. I agree that failure is often associated with shame. I think it's part of the American culture. We want to be the best and never show weakness, but that is entirely impractical. Everyone makes mistakes and if we cannot grow and learn from failures we are going to be stuck in the same spot forever.
As for shame, I think that there can definitely be times when it is constructive. It can go one of two ways. Either a person will feel shame and push themselves to do better and redeem themselves, or they will give up on the task that made them feel shamed all together. When someone works to better themselves from it, shame can be a very constructive emotion.
Many students from high school had various different actions for coping with failure. As many have stated students have said they aren’t smart enough, the teacher cannot teach the course correctly, and even the classic “when are we ever going to use this in the real world?” Although this is a minority it still is a loser’s mentality. School is not about being perfect, and it never will be about it. School is about taking a tough situation, such as possibly a tough teacher or hard time understanding, and persevering to overcome the said obstacle. On another tangent, shame is another response to a horrid grade on a quiz/test. I would be a liar if I said I have never bombed a test and so would you. I believe shame is a perfectly natural response, however, you cannot let shame consume you. I can best describe this as playing a sporting event or a musical instrument in a concert. A person can strikeout in their first at bat and feel shame. If you hold onto that shame, you’ll do terrible the entire day and it may even carry over to the next game. Just as if someone messes up at the beginning of a concert, they cannot hold that in them the entire time or they’ll bring their band down. In life you have to have a short memory, everyone screws up, but to move forward a person must overcome it and let it go.
ReplyDelete